I have been an assistant professor at a small university for a little over a year now, and teaching still takes up all of my time during the semester: with Junior on the way to boot, I have been very focussed on just making it through. Now that it's winding down, I have some room to breathe... and stare at the huge list of things to do before the big day. I can't help but focus on the work-related list: there are those 4 projects that I figured I could finish (or at least get under control). There is my graduate student, who will need to function independently for the few weeks/months before his first conference appearances. There are the proposals to referee, the thesis to read, and that research money to spend, too...
But in the back of my mind I have this nagging, unnerving feeling that for the first time since entering graduate school, none of the things on my work-related list are going to matter for a long time after the baby is born. I can't fathom what that will be like. I also can't fathom how I'm going to make it all work in the busy, exhausting post-delivery world that I'm about to enter. My comfort at the moment is that women everywhere make careers and motherhood work somehow, and that hopefully I'm no different. In the meantime, I'll start slogging though my to-do list and enjoy uninterrupted nights of sleep...
3 comments:
Welcome Astronomymommy! I look forward to reading your posts! I'm currently a PhD student in Astronomy at a big Canadian university, and plan on finishing up this summer/early fall. Then it's baby time for me! So, I will be reading with interest :)
Nice to have you join the blog!
Even though I still have a few more weeks before baby shows up, I'm in the same boat as you are, desperately trying to check things off the to-do list at work rather than thinking about picking a name for the baby, getting a crib and diapers,...
When No.1 was born I was mid-way through grad school, at that point where commitments were far less numerous and time seemed to stretch far ahead; I was far more obsessed with the baby, long before he was born. I was wondering if it was so different this time because it's the second one and I know what I'm doing (in theory!), but your story now makes me think it's probably just that I'm at a different point in my career. I don't think it's either better or worse, just very different.
Looking forward to hear more about your experiences with Junior!
Welcome again AstronomyMommy. You and AstroMaman are giving me serious baby fever! I seem to be surrounded by friends and family imminently expecting new babies. ;)
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